Fading Away is Impossible

A poem about wanting to disappear—and realizing why we cannot.

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Sometimes I wish I could just fade away,

leaving behind no memory, not even a trace

Sometimes I wish I could remove myself,

from this stupid illusion of life and space

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There are a million colors in the world;

one black less, and it won’t make any difference

There are a billion stars in the dark night sky,

one going dark won’t make any difference

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What am I in this complicated puzzle?

A minute piece of desire, and nothing else

What am I in this mine of diamonds?

A small piece of black coal, and nothing else

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Leaving would be perfect – a final solution,

to the conflict between desire and reality

Leaving would be beautiful – a final touch,

to a trashy abstract painting that I see

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Fading is simple, and leaving no trace is impossible;

removal is easy, and leaving no memory is hard

What to do and what not to do? It’s a dilemma

But I have to play it, it’s my final card

God’s Breakable Toys

a broken doll

What if everything we believe about right and wrong, love and hate, and heaven and hell, is just an elaborate lie we tell ourselves to feel significant?

A provocative philosophical poem structured as a series of “what if” questions that systematically dismantle fundamental human beliefs about existence, morality, choice, and emotion.


What if there is no eternity, there is no heaven or hell?

What if there are no consequences, good or bad, at all?

The guilt is just a loathsome burden, a rotten, stinking smell,

while life is just a dream, no ups or downs, big or small


What if there is no choice, there is no right or wrong?

What if there are no options, left or right, at all?

Life is just the time, singing a long, sad song,

while fate sits smiling, and quietly rules all


What if there is no color, there is no black or white?

What if there are no shades, dark or light, at all?

Life is just reflections, a kaleidoscope made right,

while our dreams are just dancing shadows on a wall


What if there is no feeling, there is no love or hatred?

What if there are no emotions, anger, or fear at all?

We are all just great actors, holding our roles sacred,

while each act promptly happens on the director’s call


What if there is no change, there is no sadness or joys?

What if there are no upheavals, high or low, at all?

We are all just God’s property, His breakable toys,

played with, and tossed aside, in His great hall